forever friends.

i have been incredibly busy with the end of the semester. but we took a bit of time out this weekend to head to a tulip festival here in town. tulips may be my favorite flower, but this picture is my favorite of the day. i love these boys and the friendship they have.

best friends, a photo by sassyladybug on Flickr.

so now you are 5.

andrew at 5, a photo by sassyladybug on Flickr.

when you were little you were a little ball of fire.  we couldn't go anywhere and let you walk.  you wanted to move.  it was so hard.  you wanted to see the world and run.  you didn't care where mama and daddy were.  i'll be honest, you scared me all the time.  you hid in clothing racks, ran out into traffic, refused to be held.  now, you were just a curious little monkey, but as your mama, i felt confused.  this was not how motherhood was supposed to be. i was angry with myself, because i wasn't good at this.  but i learned how to deal with your adventurous self and we stuck at home as often as possible.  we went only places where i could keep you within my grasp. i simply couldn't keep up with you.  there was one person who told me that they thought i didn't watch you enough.  boy, did i feel frustrated.  and even angry at one point - this was not supposed to be this hard.  how come it was so much easier for everyone else?

when you were still growing inside mama, the doctors did an ultrasound and they thought something was wrong with you.  it was so very early in your growth and they couldn't accurately tell us what was going to happen.  mama was sent to specialists and scary words were thrown around.  we chose to simply pray for you and ask God to take you in His hands.  we knew that we loved you no matter what.  oh we prayed so hard for you, did you know that?  and when we went for the ultrasounds further into mama's pregnancy, that area of concern was completely healed.  in fact, the doctor couldn't believe that she was looking at images of the same baby.

my sweet, when i am frustrated or tired, i realize now that God gave me a boy who likes to run and move and jump and play.  a boy who may have struggled with biting his friends but is healthy and alive.  a boy who is learning and joyful and loving.  daddy and i have learned that parenthood isn't everything you will expect it to be - it is far better.  having you in our lives is unimaginably the best thing that has happened to us.  every day with you is fun.  happy 5th birthday, andrew christopher.

little miracle.

my friend christina likes olives. and when she brought over a salad to share for lunch shortly after i had christian, she didn't like the taste of them. i immediately knew that she must be expecting. i was unbelievably excited when she said that i could photograph their sweet baby girl. i've learned so much about photography since my boys were babies and i have been anxious to try some newborn photos. this is a huge share, but i simply couldn't pick a favorite. i did narrow it down to 7 favorites which was quite an accomplishment.

i am so grateful for the experience and all the sweet cuddle time that i got with this darling baby.  her parents are dear friends of ours and we are so happy to share these amazing moments with them, as we grow as friends, centering our lives around playing cards and hanging out to planning activities our kids will enjoy together.  i'm hoping that we can continue and be friends for a very, very long time.

introducing, Allie Grace and big sister Emma.  

blacker6, a photo by sassyladybug on Flickr.

blacker7, a photo by sassyladybug on Flickr.

blacker4, a photo by sassyladybug on Flickr.

blacker1, a photo by sassyladybug on Flickr.

blacker2, a photo by sassyladybug on Flickr.

blacker3, a photo by sassyladybug on Flickr.

blacker5, a photo by sassyladybug on Flickr.

eye on my surroundings.

chris and i cut down most of a dead tree on saturday. as usual with my sweet husband, i can get him to do things by starting them myself and asking him for help. then he gladly takes over and things get done rather than just talked about. he just loves when i do this, haha. i am really loving spring. and because of the tree we cut back, i discovered this pretty little tree right next to it. it seriously bloomed overnight.

IMG_6205, a photo by sassyladybug on Flickr.

it is so pretty. some of my friends informed me that it is likely a crab apple tree and that they don't always produce crab apples. now i am going to be stalking this tree to see what happens. i know for sure that it doesn't have crab apples but it could have some sort of smaller fruit, maybe one that looks like berries.

IMG_6208, a photo by sassyladybug on Flickr.

IMG_6207, a photo by sassyladybug on Flickr.

IMG_6197, a photo by sassyladybug on Flickr.

isn't it pretty? i couldn't resist it. i have a serious black thumb but i am going to try my hand at some more gardening. i'm a bit obsessed with photographing all types of flowers.

Easter

we decided to stay home for Easter this year. it was perfect.

making pies, a photo by sassyladybug on Flickr.

and definitely not as boring as andrew is making it seem. making pies is definitely fun. we colored eggs, had a hunt in the backyard, cleaned the house. chris and i woke up early and made sure that we got to church on time. the ham was in the oven and the timer went off just as we walked in the door after church. the boys were well behaved and we didn't stress at all. a perfect holiday.

after church, we set up the tripod with my camera to take a family picture. i am so pleased with this one since the boys are actually looking at the camera - seems as though they really enjoy seeing me run back and forth from the tripod to re-set the timer.

Easter boys, a photo by sassyladybug on Flickr.

O family, a photo by sassyladybug on Flickr.

hope everyone had a good Easter!

grateful friday

the week was long but good. i have so much to be thankful for.

-a sweet date with andrew the other night. actually, an entire sweet week with him while he has been on break. granted, that one day i had a paper to write was a little frustrating. i had forgotten what it was like trying to write papers with two children at home. but, i really enjoyed the extra time with him.
-nearing the end of my semester. i still have a lot more to do to finish up, and tests to study for, but it feels good to be getting closer.
-ordering a canvas for a wall in our home, thanks to groupon. i love a good deal and i'm excited to see my own photography printed nice and large!
-we had such a terrific easter. i'm grateful for time spent with my little family.
-lastly, i lost my grammie this week. she passed earlier this week. she lived 99 long years and was a wonderful example of a christian wife and mother. i am grateful for the comfort and promise of heaven.

big kid

tee ball, a photo by sassyladybug on Flickr.

andrew started t-ball on friday. i feel as though i have blinked and suddenly i have this child before me. he will be 5 in two weeks. i am having difficulty grasping that. the days of his babyhood and toddlerhood are long gone. oh, those were such hard days. i sure do have several extra gray hairs courtesy of my sweet boy. however, as with any difficult season, it passes. he is on spring break this week and i am loving being able to spend quality time with him. most days i bring him to school and then after picking him up at the end of the day, i am running around the house gathering my things for school, getting the boys ready to go to their grandma's, and honestly, finishing up a paper last-minute. i haven't had opportunities to spend one-on-one time with him and i miss it. most of the time when i am not running off to class he relaxes on the couch and we don't do anything of quality together.
i'm going to remedy that this week. we'll make intentional memories and enjoy each other's company. before he turns 5 and i no longer have a little boy but a big kid.

a brand new day

it's monday, a brand new day, brand new week. i realize i was sort of melancholy on friday. its very likely that if you are reading this here little blog then i was not referring to you. you see, that entire aspect of life in which you outgrow friendships is difficult. and when you realize that those friendships are no longer a large part of your life, you tend to contemplate the rest of your life. one of my favorite bloggers stephanie from adventures in babywearing quoted evelyn from fried green tomatoes recently, and you better believe i added fried green tomatoes to my blockbuster queue right away. evelyn was having a midlife crisis of sorts and we all know she had zero support from her husband, but she was too young to be old and too old to be young. seriously? yes. i am too young to be headed out in the evenings to t-ball practice and worrying about buying a home in an area with a good high school. i am too old to be focusing on silly things like friendships. you know what, i have a very good grasp on the fact that although i feel this way at 31, i will also feel this way at 41, 51, 61 and so on.
and so, monday. a new day, a new week. moving forward.

grateful friday

i'm choosing to be grateful today, simply because it is not coming naturally. not that i am naturally thankful for every aspect of my life, but this week has been long and certain circumstances have left me feeling very sad. i'm trying not to allow myself to constantly think of that sadness and instead, dwell on the positive things within my week.

- although it was completed at the very last minute, i handed in a huge project this week. major sense of accomplishment and one step closer toward being done with my Masters.
- andrew begins t-ball tonight. this boy is growing up and its so much fun to watch.
- i got to snuggle a newborn baby this week for a chance to try some newborn photos. i am loving this phase of learning with photography and this baby was unbelievably sweet.
- lastly, i am especially thankful for friends this week. part of my sadness is caught in that strange void between who you used to be and who you are now. i think it is very difficult to articulate the place that i am in. people who i considered close to me no longer are. so i am thankful for the friends who are there, for those new friends that have come along who mean the world.